Pesach (Passover) is coming soon and we Jews are busy searching for and cleaning the chametz (leavened food that is forbidden on Pesach) from our homes. But we must not get so busy searching for the pretzels our kids stuffed behind the couch cushions that we forget to look for the chametz inside of ourselves.

What is this internal chametz? It’s all the detritus – the negative character traits, immoral desires, etc. – that impurify us and hold us back from being the best that we can be.

What is YOUR chametz?

My chametz mostly stems from a poor self-image. As a result, I struggle with disordered eating and procrastination (I become paralyzed by thinking I will screw up a task, so instead I often just avoid it).

Rereading the excellent The Carlebach Haggadah, based on the teachings of Rabbi Shlomo Carlebach (may the memory of the righteous be for a blessing), reminded me how important it is to constantly search for, and then eradicate, one’s personal chametz:

What keeps us from being free sometimes is a very small thing. Chametz is assur b’mashehu – it’s forbidden for us to have even the smallest amount of it in our possession, because sometimes one crumb can destroy your life. 

You know, friends, most married couples that get divorced do it not because of a major event, but because of small events – tiny crumbs. As Pesach comes we’re getting rid of all those tiny crumbs. Between redemption and slavery is a mashehu, a crumb, a speck. Between being a good father, a good mother, and not being proper parents is just a mashehu, something so tiny. Real redemption comes when we walk around with a candle and find this tiny trait that’s holding us back from being what we could be, this little thing that’s in essence ruining us – when we find it and burn it (page 10).

But how does one go about getting rid of his or her negative character traits? The book Cheshbon HaNefesh, which was first published in 1812 by Rabbi Menachem Mendel Levin (may the memory of the righteous be for a blessing), is a guide to character refinement that has many useful tips for overcoming one’s personal chametz. One suggestion (page 59) is to pick a single character trait to work on each week. The reader is advised to say that character trait out loud each morning, to focus the concentration on it, and then to consider when one will have the opportunity to positively apply that character trait during the day.

Happy Pesach! May you have a Kosher holiday, both in the physical and spiritual sense…

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